IndyCar Classic Predictions and Prognostications: On the Road Again

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Photo from cicuitoftheamericas.com

In its infinite wisdom, IndyCar visits yet another rampantly redundant road course this weekend – and it’s most definitely not music to our ears.

Turns out a wide array of musicians sing songs titled “On the Road Again,” including most famously Texas’ own Willie Nelson, Canned Heat, Barrabas and a group called Amphetamine Eaters to name but a few. And that’s not to mention derivative ditties like the Grateful Dead’s “Natural Born Easy (On the Road Again),” either. Our special prediction of the race deals specifically with the quick cars being on the road – again.

Image from countryfancast.com

Directly counter to the conventional view of every other single outlet and commentator in existence, Sunday’s show won’t be gripping viewing, but rather a rerun of the numerous other identical road races – like the very next one in Alabama. Lacking in excitement, speed and overtaking – also known as quality racing – COTA will amount to a high dollar, low interest parade around a three and a half mile f-ing F1 circuit. To us, such an ear splitting waste of horsepower strikes an extremely sour note.

Our pick for pole also may sound like a familiar tune, Continue reading

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Honda 200 Predictions and Prognostications: Camp Edition

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Photo from foxnews.com

Maybe several coats of pretty pastel Sherwin-Williams paint could spruce up the fifty something sports car course and campground, but as for the racing this weekend don’t count on much to look at. We at IRR can’t remember the last remotely watchable race at Mid-Ohio and although we’ve been fooled once this season by the racing on a road course unfortunately it’s highly unlikely Sunday. The track’s simply unsuitable for IndyCars and if they want fans squealing with delight then the series really ought to find a better place to camp next season.

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Photo from pinterest.com

Anticipating abject and unrelenting tedium in the woods we’ll be Live Tweeting the “event” in the hopes of adding some spice and maybe even a touch of camp. Those noisy IndyCars at rustic Mid-Ohio – it’s all just a bit too manly for our tastes. Our special prediction for the race involves the campers at Mid-Ohio, or rather a large contingent of “glampers” invading the track this weekend. Largely city boys out for a thrill, there’ll be some spontaneous weddings break out on the lovely, wooded hillsides where methanol fumes magically intermingle with wispy campfire smoke. Sometimes and especially this year IndyCar needs a feminine touch – and the glampers won’t disappoint.

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Image from Indy Race Reviewer

Our prediction for pole sitter – such a deliciously descriptive term, isn’t it? – started second last year and has been hotter than a gay pride parade ever since. CFH’s Josef Newgarden – an attractive young man in great shape and with even better hair – has given Americans of all orientations someone to lustily cheer for in 2015. He’s just so cute!

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Photo from indycar.com

At the other end of the happy scale, first out of the race will be Continue reading