IndyCar News Week In Review: Ishtar Edition

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500 Field Fillers: Andretti Autosport got sportier for the month of May. Easter wishes came true for both big Brit Justin Wilson and Swiss Miss Simona de Silvestro who’ll drive for AA in the Indy 500, bringing the team’s total to five cars for the five hundred mile extravaganza. No announcement was made regarding the replacement of Marco in the car as of yet, though due to his dismal record of one win per decade we expect one at any time. On the bright side, at least Kurt Busch won’t be driving one of Michael’s rides this year.

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The Aged at the Ancient: Like an old married couple, together for over fifty years and still going is the world’s greatest rock and roll band The Rolling Stones who’ll play at the Brickyard in July. At 106 years old, the Speedway’s a bit senior to Mick and the boys who now are in their seventh decade of existence. Having seen both, at this point in their respective careers we recommend IMS over IBS and the Stones.

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ABCs of Ovals: AJ Foyt Racing’s longtime sponsor ABC Supply Co. will sponsor the 500 mile IndyCar race at Pocono August 23. Continue reading

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N@$C@R Predictions: Feisty Fontana

IRR’s crystal ball crew has been busy celebrating our stupendous success in last week’s prognostications, nailing the race winner and several other lesser predictions. So if our offerings are a bit meandering you’ll understand why. This week the series goes to Southern California, a place the Stranger in “The Big Lebowski” described as “high in the running as one of the laziest places on earth.”

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SoCal’s vibe doesn’t really mesh that easily with NASCAR. It’s tantamount to the Dude attending a cock fight, or even a goat swap. As a consequence, lots of empty aluminum will be on display today in the spring California sun.

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If you’re a regular reader then you know we’re not picking Kurt Busch to win. Continue reading

France’s Series in Phoenix: Feh

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In unspectacular fashion, Kevin Harvick won his fifth race of the last six at PIR just as we predicted. In a bit of a yawner, there were only three leaders the entire race and as expected Harvick pulled away for an easy victory at the end. Surprisingly, we also foretold a crash fest at Phoenix as well as Danica, Kurt Busch and Tony Stewart all doing poorly. The race had a total ten cautions with Tony Stewart involved in two of them while Danica’s ass-around spin appropriately caused another.

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“Smoked” Stewart crashed twice and to our knowledge didn’t make any post race ISIS references or announce his conversion to Islam. Continue reading

N@$C@R Predictions: Phoenix Felonies Edition

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Notice: Due to poor recent performance, IRR’s NASCAR soothsayers have been permanently reassigned to much harder and less desirable positions. Please excuse the mess while our crystal ball is being polished. Nevertheless, we persevere. The “BUFF” cars visit Phoenix this week, site of Superbowls, sandstorms and one tough Sheriff, so here are this week’s prognostications –

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Kurt Busch won’t win, therefore all RV walls and any WAG who unfortunately happens to be around him should beware. Of course he won’t be prosecuted either, as KB enjoys special privileges and immunities his lowly fans do not.

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After offering shocking support of terror group ISIS last week in a possible high profile case of Stockholm syndrome, Tony Stewart Continue reading

IndyCar News Week in Review: Stand Pat Edition

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Aero Kit Antagonism: We published “Honda’s IndyCar Aero Kits Also Look Ugly, Silly and New Fangled” immediately upon seeing them Tuesday evening and haven’t changed our take on them. Honda’s kit makes Chevy’s look sane by comparison and that’s saying something. Alarmingly, new cars aren’t due for four years. The saving grace of the aero kits still could be the large oval configuration which hasn’t been seen yet. They should make their debut testing at Texas Motor Speedway in the near future so we’ll see.

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Southern European Silly Season: Swiss Miss Simona de Silvestro and the as yet un-nicknamed Stefano Coletti from Monaco were both announced as IndyCar drivers this week. Continue reading

NASCAR Visits Vegas: Vegetative Tedium

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The racing again on Sunday was better off without Busch and we fervently hope it remains that way. Frankly we didn’t watch the Las Vegas race except for the last forty or so laps and happily it doesn’t appear as though we missed much. NASCAR‘s version of race killing turbulence called  “aero push” made another appearance at Las Vegas Motor Speedway making passing difficult and watching the race even more so. It’s a real shame IndyCar no longer races at LVMS after the aborted 2011 finale that tragically claimed Dan Wheldon’s life. Unlike NASCAR, which by the way enjoyed a huge crowd Sunday, open wheel cars put on a hell of a show in the desert.

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A predictably tedious NASCAR race, we bet on boring and it turned out to be the smart money. There were a total of five cautions over the four hundred miles, though not in the early going as long stretches of green flag racing and “aero pushing” set the tone. Surprisingly there were no debris cautions or flags at all for that matter late in the race, which Kevin Harvick dominated. Continue reading

N@$C@R Predictions & Prognostications: Lost Vegas Edition

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Our cracked crystal ball crew takes another stab at divining NASCAR’s near future in the “Lost Vegas” Edition. Why lost? NASCAR’s visiting Sin City, the most garish place on earth and location of one of our favorite books and films, “Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.” If you’re familiar with the story then you know why it’s lost Vegas. If you’re not, then rush out for the Terry Gilliam directed classic starring Johnny Depp now.

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The irrepressible Hunter S. Thompson – a true inspiration as the original Gonzo journalist – “covers” a chaotic motorbike race in the desert while destroying hotel rooms and partying on and off the Strip. And all NASCAR has to offer is Darrell Waltrip bleating on about two ton, sub-200 mph glorified safety cages on Fox.

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IRR’s divining division looks a lot like the hotel room in “Fear and Loathing,” with their recent NASCAR predictions in somewhat of a shambles. So with the assistance of a beery, dusty, hazy Vegas stupor – and before hotel management shows up at the door – here goes our latest roll of the dice. Mind you when it comes to many of the following prognostications, we wouldn’t bet on it.

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Kurt Busch will still be watching the weekend’s festivities from his Walter White style meth cooking RV, only this weekend his undisclosed location will be much nearer the actual racing. Look out, ladies of Las Vegas.  Continue reading

N@$C@R Predictions & Prognostications: Sherman Through Atlanta Edition

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Urgent note from IRR’s Editorial Board – Emergency Session: Snowed in, beyond bored and suffering the effects of cabin fever, our cracked soothsaying division implemented a hostile takeover of the editorial room and insisted these NASCAR predictions be published. We do so very much against our will. They made us do it! Rest assured, this site remains dedicated primarily to IndyCar, but extreme times call for extreme measures. The current situation certainly constitutes that. Need some good news? Feel fortunate you aren’t being held captive in an office building by a bunch of crazed fortune tellers this weekend.

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Now for a word or two on NASCAR. First, a stolen race car?! Come on, fellas. Hire a security guard when you’re in Atlanta, for goodness’ sake. The Friday night fiasco “qualifying session” saw the inspection line resembling Black Friday at Wal-Mart with a number of cars disqualified and unable to post times. Instead they were ordered by owner points. THAT’s what the paying customers want.

Jeff Gordon called the ordeal “embarrassing.” Smoke, who didn’t turn an official lap, Tweeted “Frustrating!” It’s clearly no way to run a circus, even if there are new qualifying rules for 2015. We found the whole ordeal amusing. Our friends at Autoracing1 could hardly keep straight faces while Tweeting about it. Predictions published below were done so under duress –

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Kurt Busch Continue reading

IndyCar: It’s About Time

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After an unprecedented seven month sabbatical, it’s about time the 2015 IndyCar season began. For fans of artistry on wheels, it’s also about time in a larger sense of the word. Two significant events in recent history – Brazil’s abrupt and embarrassing cancellation of IndyCar’s season opener and a thoroughly critical viewing of NASCAR’s – caused us to look at racing in a new and timely way.

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The old adage remains true – time is precious, valuable and fleeting. IndyCar features shorter races than NASCAR, in part a factor of much faster race cars – as much as thirty miles per hour, or some 15% speedier. A casual viewing of races from both series illustrates NASCAR’s timed tardiness, even on television and with certain commentators attempting to obscure the facts.

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Pit stops, pit in laps, pit out laps and lap times in general are all considerably quicker. Continue reading

Daytona Debrief: A Dystopian Dud

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Penske Racing’s Joey Logano won NASCAR‘s “Super Bowl of Racing” yesterday at Daytona International Speedway. The nicest item we’ve to report? At least the audience wasn’t subjected to Katy Perry parading around on a giant tiger. Also, America learned how many female soccer players it takes to start a NASCAR race. It’s three.

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The Indy 500 it clearly wasn’t, although admittedly the three wide racing in the last quarter of the race was enjoyable to watch. With the Captain in victory circle again for a fleeting moment – after several hours of drinking, mind you – we were almost fooled. Happily, Joey Logano didn’t climb the fence and we quickly regained our senses.

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Like a Lifetime movie – though that could simply be the “Busch effect” –  the ending was painful, anti-climactic and left us wanting. Continue reading