St. Pete Race Review: New Season? Newgarden

jonewindycarcom

Photo from indycar.com

In a predictably prominent Penske affair, Josef Newgarden cruised to his eleventh career win at St. Pete over Scott Dixon. “It just worked out perfectly,” the positive pilot postulated post race.

During the pre race show, Paul Tracy exclaimed “there are Swedes everywhere!” Sounds like an ideal beach party to us. Also included was a nice update and interview with Robert Wickens, who vowed to come back from his devastating, paralizing injury last season at Pocono.

A controversial qualifying session, which saw Dixon initially miss the top twelve before not only making the fast six but starting fourth, had Will “Sour Grapes” Power on pole, again predictably. In fact, an all Penske front row rounded out by Newgarden was trailed by an all Ganassi second row – with the Swedish rookie Rosenqvist actually outpacing defending champ Dixie – and an all Andretti third row of 500 winners Ryan Hunter-Reay and Alexander Rossi. In other qualifying news, only Marco can manage to run out of fuel without turning a single lap.

marcoleia

The start saw a slight delay thanks to the cumbersome two seater and – as usual – failed radio communication with same. Why they insist upon trying to talk to the backseat rider time after time in vain is simply beyond us. Continue reading

Advertisements

St. Pete Preview: Swede Smell of Unsuccess

100_1340

IRR’s far from neutral in our insights into IndyCar’s incredibly iffy intro to 2019.

Expect a typically erratic, albeit mildly entertaining start to the campaign on the streets of St. Pete, with nothing even approaching an error-free opener, much less Swedish drivers distinguishing themselves in any positive way. That’s coming from an author who’s actually visited Sweden – or as close as Stockholm comes these days.

Despite a lamentably lame and lackluster course, the initial contest of the season is often surprisingly watchable, for as noted in last year’s preview, “My God – It’s Full of Rookies!,” the stunning lack of experience in what’d be considered spring training in any other sport usually provides some laughs – if not worse. We’re not merely referring to the outrageous maiming of paying race fans at the track a few years back, either.

stpetedebris

With a pair of Swedish rookies meatballing their way through their inaugural IndyCar race there’ll be plenty of Nordic-headed behavior on display. And that’s not even counting the micro talented, macro ego-ed Marco, who hasn’t won a race in nearly a decade and routinely makes the term driver as big of a joke as a Jussie Smollett “hate crime.” Though not saying much, IndyCar’s actual Vikings will greatly out-pillage Mario’s mediocre, milquetoast grandson – and all without the benefit of Volvos! Continue reading

Nineteen Predictions for the 2019 IndyCar Season

Swedish Bikini Team IRR

Anticipate another entertaining season opener on St. Pete’s street course oddly enough, even without flying aero kit pieces or Juan “street cleaner” Montoya in the field. Less surprisingly, thrilling contests again will ensue at Texas Motor Speedway and Gateway Motorsports Park, both oval races held under the lights. Now if only the egg heads at 16th & Georgetown would heed IRR’s advice and return Iowa’s race to a nocturnal knife fight and bring back excellent tracks like Kentucky, Chicagoland, Michigan and Fontana we’d have more awesome oval affairs to look forward to.

The series’ pair of new Swedish drivers – Schmidt’s Marcus Ericsson and Ganassi’s Felix Rosenqvist – will spend the 2019 campaign stuck in neutral. Suffice it to say their transition won’t be pretty.

A second season running the new cars will make the disparity between the series’ haves and have-nots even greater, unfortunately. Last year saw Penske win yet another 500 and Ganassi take the championship – again. An entire off season of the super teams fine tuning their machines won’t help matters. Continue reading

Mid-Ohio IndyCar Preview: Ganassi’s Paradise

GanassisParadise

IndyCar’s annual visit to Mid-Ohio brings to mind Coolio’s classic track “Gangsta’s Paradise,” although in actuality it’s Ganassi’s paradise in more ways than one. Both places are plenty dangerous with lots of twists, turns and curves – but only one’s dull as daytime lookout duty. Get the Courvoisier and blunts ready for this one, y’all!

Been spending most their lives
Livin’ in a gangsta’s paradise

dixiebusinessinsidercom.jpg

Photo from businessinsider.com

Scott Dixon’s five wins at the joint most definitely mean he’s ridin’ dirty. They also highlight Chip “G-daddy” Ganassi’s utter dominance of central Ohio’s hood. That’s how he rolls and he definitely woke, yo. Chipster’s stealing seven out of the last ten (excuses for) races is straight dope, man. Charlie “Straight Outta Cali” Kimball’s breakthrough victory in 2013 was one of ’em, going from ghetto to penthouse with that fashizzzle.

Ganassi’s got one bangin’ posse, though there are of course exceptions. Not surprisingly, Tony “old over the hill bastard” Kanaan has never scored in the O. And don’t get us started on G-daddy’s fourth driver Max “Paris” Chilton. He definitely unwoke and ’bout to be replaced by some Swede named Rosenqvist.

grahamandstatuetwittercom.jpg

Photo from twitter.com

Graham “homeboy” Rahal won in 2015 in yet another of those ‘luckily timed pit stops that win you the race’ kind of deals. It’s cool as hell driving for your dad’s team, ain’t it? Continue reading