Indy Grand Prix Preview: Pagenaud, the Destroyer


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Pags and the Penskes have been destroying it lately, eliciting widespread fear – and worse.

“Paranoia, the Destroyer” as the Kinks artfully put it runs rampant throughout IndyCar. Specifically, Penske paranoia – a creeping, deep seeded fear that Pagenaud the Destroyer and crew will win every remaining blasted race.

You blow it all with paranoia.

You’re so insecure, you self destroyer.

Pagenaud has won a lot lately, so much so that we’re getting tired of his winning. He won the previous race either way you look at it – both at Phoenix and last season’s Indy GP. It’s starting to become habitual for the Frenchman. His seemingly unending tear dates back over a year now, as he absolutely ran away with it at Phoenix, just like 2016’s procession around the IMS infield.


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Feelin’ guilty, feelin’ scared.

Hidden cameras everywhere!

It’s no wonder why the other teams are fearful of the Cap’n’s outfit. They own two wins and every single pole as the series hurtles toward its pinnacle spectacle on Memorial Day weekend. First, there’s this little matter of the Indy Grand Prix, where Pagenaud’s been unstoppable except for 2015 when his engine blew up. He’s two for three at the Indy GP and – adding insult to injury – Power won the other one. Let’s not forget Newgarden’s already won this season or that Power and Helio have at least been quick in quals.

Stop. Hold on.

Stay in control.

Which reminds us, speaking of Power . . .


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She said, ‘Man, there’s really something wrong with you.

One day you’re going to self destruct.’

This marks the fourth annual Indy GP, which is remarkable since the inaugural event  nearly hair-lipped the Mayor. It also foreshadowed a certain Russian’s recklessness and presaged the present paranoia. Can someone who’s actually on his meds please remind us again why it’s such a good idea to race around IMS’ service roads? Especially when there are perfectly serviceable oval tracks omitted from the schedule?


There’s a red under my bed.

And there’s a little green man in my head.

But back to the other, lesser organizations for a moment. Inconsistency seems to sum them up, unless of course you’re talking AJ Foyt Racing or Andretti Autosport. Then it’s been just consistently bad. Making matters worse in the competition department, Ganassi’s boys have been all over the place, or as Ray Davies wrote:

You’re up, you’re down, I can’t work you out.

You get a good thing going and you blow yourself out.

IGP start

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SPM had some success at Long Beach with Hinch’s win, but they’ve struggled otherwise. Mikhail “Mash-up” Aleshin‘s getting a rough, Kimball-esque reputation for taking others out. At Phoenix it was again on the first lap.


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Self destroyer, wreck your health.

Destroy your friends, destroy yourself!

Penske’s won consecutive races and appears strong – yet again – at Speedway in the month of May. No surprise there. Pagenaud’s on track to successfully defend his trophy, his title, and more. Newgarden, Power and Helio are all lurking. Hell, even Montoya will be back from exile soon. With the 500 rapidly approaching the overriding question is, just how paranoid should the non-Penskes be?

And it goes like this!



4 thoughts on “Indy Grand Prix Preview: Pagenaud, the Destroyer

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