Initial Ideas and Insights Into IndyCar’s Impending Imminence

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Are Foyt’s Fixes Finally Functional? With two new pilots, brand new Chevy engines and in the midst of an exhilarating era in which it seems almost anything’s possible, A.J.’s team just might stand a chance at success in 2017. Finally. The ornery octogenarian‘s outfit will be one to watch, with the caveat of consistently disappointing performances since at least the IRL days.

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Can Ganassi Going Geisha Garner Gains? The change back to Honda comes after a Hillary level disappointing season, with neither a 500 win nor a championship to the Chipster’s credit, not to mention Target’s departure after a quarter century of sponsorship. Dixon’s still an ace, especially on the roadies, and Charlie “fearless” Kimball’s improving. But TK, the aged one? And TBD, meaning perhaps the return of Englishman Max “Paris” Chilton? Seems Ganassi could have developed a deeper bench. Meanwhile, Sage Karam‘s coaching wrestling.

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Which Andretti Autosport Are You Asking About? On this Jekyll and Hyde team, there’s the Borg Warner emblazoned Hunter-Reay and Rossi side, then there’s the why are they here? Marco and Taku side. Michael’s constant mad scientist like experimentation is utterly baffling and often frightening.

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Shall Sam Schmidt’s SPM Stay Secondary? While Crazy Legs Canuck Hinchcliffe and Mikhail “no visible facial Gorbachev birthmarks” Aleshin are competent drivers, they haven’t exactly been doing the Hopak in victory lane lately. Hinch’s last win – and only one at SPM – came in a bog at the regrettable New Orleans race. Two years ago. The Russkie’s never won, though he has shown toughness. There’s even talk of a third entry, which can only help the dwindling car count. How many more years must we endure these ruinous, race ruining and rueful aero kits?

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Ragin’ Rahal Receiving Ride Mate? Son of Stache cooled off a bit last season winning a single race, but remains a threat to win nearly every weekend. A rumored full time team mate would probably help – unless it’s Oriol “Old Man Without The Sea” Servia – just as Bobby getting out of Graham’s ear did a couple years ago.

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Will There Even Be a KV? Champ Car’s dead enders could be approaching another dead end, this time in their team’s rather slim history in the sport. Abandoned by a Frenchman – for Dale Coyne, of all people – the battered team currently resides in a shelter and may not make next season’s grid at all. We hadn’t realized the Australian dollar had grown so weak.

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Is Powerful Penske Poised to Piss on the Paddock’s Parades? With the addition of Newkid to a lineup of French Champion Pagenaud, Helio “the h is silent” Castro-Neves and Sour Grapes Power, this super team just became duper. It’s a real shame for fans of underdogs everywhere – as well as those who just get tired of watching the Cap’n win every battle – particularly considering what douches (except for ‘elio) Josef’s joining down in North Carolina.

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Does Dreadful “Dollar” Dale Deserve Doing? Coyne has Frenchman Sebastien “rhymes with has been” Bourdais and some dude from Dubai driving for him. So no, Dale doesn’t deserve doing.

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