Honda 200 Predictions and Prognostications: Camp Edition

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Photo from foxnews.com

Maybe several coats of pretty pastel Sherwin-Williams paint could spruce up the fifty something sports car course and campground, but as for the racing this weekend don’t count on much to look at. We at IRR can’t remember the last remotely watchable race at Mid-Ohio and although we’ve been fooled once this season by the racing on a road course unfortunately it’s highly unlikely Sunday. The track’s simply unsuitable for IndyCars and if they want fans squealing with delight then the series really ought to find a better place to camp next season.

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Anticipating abject and unrelenting tedium in the woods we’ll be Live Tweeting the “event” in the hopes of adding some spice and maybe even a touch of camp. Those noisy IndyCars at rustic Mid-Ohio – it’s all just a bit too manly for our tastes. Our special prediction for the race involves the campers at Mid-Ohio, or rather a large contingent of “glampers” invading the track this weekend. Largely city boys out for a thrill, there’ll be some spontaneous weddings break out on the lovely, wooded hillsides where methanol fumes magically intermingle with wispy campfire smoke. Sometimes and especially this year IndyCar needs a feminine touch – and the glampers won’t disappoint.

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Image from Indy Race Reviewer

Our prediction for pole sitter – such a deliciously descriptive term, isn’t it? – started second last year and has been hotter than a gay pride parade ever since. CFH’s Josef Newgarden – an attractive young man in great shape and with even better hair – has given Americans of all orientations someone to lustily cheer for in 2015. He’s just so cute!

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Photo from indycar.com

At the other end of the happy scale, first out of the race will be Will Power who’ll see his championship chances shrivel up like he’s been thrown into a cold shower. Team Penske historically has enjoyed rotten luck at Mid-Ohio and happily we foresee that continuing this weekend. There are still a few areas in which the Cap’n just doesn’t feel comfortable – and the festive, promiscuous campgrounds of Mid-Ohio is definitely one of them.

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Image from Indy Race Reviewer

For biggest surprise of the race we’re going with CFH Racing’s Luca Filippi. He can’t do worse than Ed’s been doing in the 20 car and coming from Italy – he’s single, fellas – may fully embrace the track’s full blown campiness. Plus we’re obviously banking on his team mate being as fast as a . . . well, you know. Although strongly tempted to pick Graham Rahal to win on his home track, he’s taken and so we’ve moved on.

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Photo from foxsports.com

Hot young hard body Sage Karam caught our eye briefly too, and while reckless enough he’s just too straight to win on the winding road course. In the end we’re going with the pole sitter and all around looker Josef Newgarden to notch his third win of the year. He’s so dreamy – ever notice the resemblance to heart throb football thrower Tom Brady? After the caterwauling celebrations coming in the campgrounds, we’re only hoping Josef doesn’t decide to destroy his phone.

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Photo from chicagotribune.com

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2 thoughts on “Honda 200 Predictions and Prognostications: Camp Edition

  1. Pingback: Mid-Ohio Race Review: ‘Graham Being Graham’ Edition | Indy Race Reviewer: Fast & Funniness

  2. Pingback: IndyCar News Week in Review: Derrick, We Hardly Knew Ye | Indy Race Reviewer: Fast & Funniness

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