Fontana Predictions & Prognostications: ‘Estimated Prophet’ Edition

ACSaporg

Photo from ap.org

“Rainbows end down that highway, where ocean breezes blow.”

IRR estimates good things at Auto Club Speedway, including a full five hundred miles of ecstasy inducing oval racing on Saturday. IndyCar – when not fouled up by over-officious, busy-body race stewards in the interest of “safety” – provides lots of passing, side by side racing and an edge of your seat, scintillating show. Since it’s California, happily there’s no chance of a rain out in the only place on the planet enduring a years’ long drought that still releases millions of gallons of fresh water into the ocean annually. Only the land that gave us the Grateful Dead could inspire such wondrously wacked “Estimated Prophets.”

“California – a prophet on the burnin’ shore.”

Back to racing and a special prediction we have for this week’s glorious oval race. In honor of California’s own late great Jerry Garcia who famously had his own brushes with the law, we prophesied lots and lots of penalties in SoCal. This season’s been rife with infractions, fines and even double secret probation being handed out by IndyCar’s iron fist of justice, also known as race control. Drivers throughout the field are feeling the heat both literally and figuratively and Saturday’s gonna look like the parking lot at a Dead concert. With twice the usual amount of racing and only five races to go at its conclusion, the MAVTV 500 should keep Brian Barnhart and company busy enforcing all afternoon long.

Simon Pagenaud, Team Penske Chevrolet, Ryan Hunter-Reay, Andretti Autosport Honda and Sebastien Bourdais, KVSH Racing crash

Photo from motorsport.com

“Still I know I lead the way, they tell me where I’ll go.”

Pole position – which means less in this race than perhaps any other on the schedule – will go to Juan Pablo Montoya, a favorite of many to win after his second Indy 500 victory in May. We estimate he’ll win pole, but that’s where our vision for the forty-ish Colombian ends. “You know?”

Juan Pablo Montoya, of Colombia, celebrates after winning the 99th running of the Indianapolis 500 auto race at Indianapolis Motor Speedway in Indianapolis, Sunday, May 24, 2015. (AP Photo/Darron Cummings)

Photo from sports.yahoo.com

“It’s gonna be just like they say, voices tell me so.”

Takuma Sato‘s strange and unique affliction – the “500 mile brain fade” – will strike the Japanese driver yet again, resulting in AJ Foyt’s entry rightfully being the first out of the race. Our pick for biggest surprise of the event will be Dale Coyne‘s Frenchman Tristan Vautier, for simply not being out first. Just kidding. The frog’s got talent, is quick and can be fun to watch. It’s just too bad he’s in a Coyne Honda.

Tony Kanaan, of Brazil, during practice for the IndyCar Firestone Grand Prix of St. Petersburg auto race Saturday, March 28, 2015, in St. Petersburg, Fla. The race takes place on Sunday. (AP Photo/Chris O'Meara)  ORG XMIT: OTKCO172

Photo from sports.usatoday.com

“Like an angel standing in a shaft of light, rising up to paradise – I know I’m gonna shine.”

2014 race winner Tony Kanaan’s our pick to repeat, emerging from the field for another appearance in a familiar victory lane – he visited it less than a year ago. It’ll be TK’s first win since then and another notch in the Chipster‘s rather lengthy belt. Now THAT’S some vision, huh?

chipdivided

Image from Indy Race Reviewer

“I call down thunder and speak the same. My word fills the sky with flame. Might and glory gonna be my name, and they’re gonna light my way.”

canews.nationalgeographiccom

Photo from nationalgeographic.com

Our final prediction is that you’ll enjoy the race immensely and find yourself wishing more great oval tracks populated IndyCar’s schedule. It’ll be a fiery show in Fontana.

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One thought on “Fontana Predictions & Prognostications: ‘Estimated Prophet’ Edition

  1. Pingback: Fontana Race Review: Shut Up And Drive Edition | Indy Race Reviewer: Fast & Funniness

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