N@$C@R Predictions and Prognostications: Daytona Edition

danicasicom

Photo from si.com

Swept up in the day’s euphoria, we’ve broken down and violated a cardinal rule of ours. Obviously this is a site primarily concerned with IndyCar, although there’s always some crossover in racing and we freely admit Kurt Busch is pure gold. Fully realizing the Daytona 500 is a NASCAR event and not IndyCar, we rationalized by saying at least it’s racing (of sorts). It’s either this or wait another five weeks for St. Pete and frankly our patience has run out.

IRR’s special soothsaying division predicted as much, having its special one off NASCAR prognostications for Daytona ready in advance. From race winner to attendance to levels of violence, our fortune tellers provide a comprehensive vision of NASCAR’s near-future. We predict you’ll be amazed at what they’ve divined.

kbzimbiocom

Photo from zimbio.com

Fewer heads will be smashed into motor home walls this year, though the total won’t reach zero with Kevin Harvick, Jeff Gordon and Brad Keselowski still in the series. 

AP NASCAR TEXAS AUTO RACING S CAR USA TX

Photo from ftw.usatoday.com

There’ll be lots fans masquerading as empty seats at the speedway today, along with many sunburned, tattooed, drunken and confused actual race fans. “Where’s ma phone?!”

nsportsespngocom

Photo from sports.espn.go.com

Danica once again will disappoint her dedicated and devoted followers and on Sunday night will have only one win in two hundred and ten big league races (including Nationwide series starts). “Marketing machine,” in deed.

Danica Patrick

Photo from washingtonpost.com

There’s another pseudo green/white/checker finish in Daytona’s future. “Boogity!”

Jimmy Johnson will join the Daytona 500 three time winner club after an entertaining – though highly manufactured – finish. “Yawn.”

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2 thoughts on “N@$C@R Predictions and Prognostications: Daytona Edition

  1. Pingback: N@$C@R Predictions & Prognostications: Sherman Through Atlanta Edition | Indy Race Reviewer: Fast & Funniness

  2. Pingback: Daytona Debrief: A Dystopian Dud | Indy Race Reviewer: Fast & Funniness

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